Every Grain Becomes a Memory
by Elphaba C. Snow Thropp
Summary: Amelia Shepherd never dreamed her life would be like this.
**AN: I'm still writing Can't Help Falling, so please don't ask.**

* * *

 **Every Grain Becomes a Memory**

 _Little boy, when you speak, I can't help, but kiss your cheek.  
I love the way you grab my hands and tell me all about your plans._

* * *

Amelia Shepherd never dreamed her life would be like this. She had hoped, sure, but it had never actually seemed like a real possibility. Not for her. More of a fantasy than anything if she was totally honest. She never in her wildest dream thought she would have this. Sometimes she has to take a moment to catch her breath and let the reality of it sink in.

She is a mother.

She is the mother of a gorgeous baby boy who lights up her world with his other mother's smile.

That was another unexpected aspect of her life. She is married. To the one and only Arizona Robbins. That thought still made her giggle because Arizona is the one of the most put together women she has ever known and she had, for some crazy reason, agreed to marry Hurricane Amelia. Arizona likes to say she is mostly tempered to a tropical storm now though.

"Mama?"

He has the sweetest voice in the world, this she knows for a fact. There is video evidence that confirms that he sounds just like Arizona did at his age and every time he speaks, or does anything really, her heart feels so full she thinks one day it might explode.

"Yes, bub?"

The two year old leans the whole front of his body against her legs and haphazardly points behind him. "Mommy doin'?"

Amelia glances across the backyard at her wife and has to stifle the immediate bubble of laughter that threatens to break out. Arizona, the weirdo that she is, is talking to the family of rabbits that frequent their backyard. Because Arizona is two months pregnant and feeling inordinately empathetic, so obviously she has to converse with the rabbits.

Obviously.

"She's talking to the bunnies, bubby," she tells him quietly just as Arizona looks up from the ground and shoots a beaming smile at them.

The little boy giggles and waves frantically at his mommy, and she knows it's ridiculous and impossible, but he has Amelia's smile, she is sure. The dimples are all Arizona, of course, but his smile is the perfect copy of her own. And it blows her away.

She never thought she would have this.

Oh, she had wanted it, but after her beautiful unicorn baby, she never imagined she would have it again. Not like this.

She was never meant to have the perfect little family.

And thinking back to the year before they got pregnant with their son, maybe she doesn't have a perfect little family, but it's perfect to her. It's perfect _for_ her.

"Silly?" He asks, pointing to his blonde mother.

She has to laugh because yes, her wife is absolutely silly and it tickles her that even their toddler has picked up on it. "Yes, bub. Mommy is very silly."

"I silly, Mama?" The intensity of the cerulean color of Arizona's eyes freaked Amelia out when they met for the first time, then they endeared her when they started dating, then she fell in love with everything about them as she fell in love with Arizona, and now their son has her eyes, and they sparkle and shine in just the same way that the blonde's do and it's the most magical thing Amelia's ever seen.

She falls in love with Arizona more and more every single day because she's Arizona and there are no words to describe just how overwhelmingly in love with her she is, but seeing the most perfect parts of her in their son is _so fucking much_ that it moves Amelia to tears.

Loving him is the scariest thing she's ever done, but it's also the best experience of her life.

"You are the silliest little man ever," she punctuates her declaration by blowing a raspberry against his chubby, dimpled cheek, making him chortle softly in delight.

He's a quiet little boy. He's happy, quick to laugh, and quiet, which she knows he gets from Arizona. He's also a magnet for trouble and the most charming baby at the hospital's nursery, which she likes to think are two traits that come from her. At least the trouble part. Arizona is pretty damn charming. But the two women are so much alike that it's hard to tell which of his behaviors come from her or Arizona. She does know that he has her "thinky" face (Arizona's a peds surgeon so she lets it slide) and Arizona's pout.

"What's going on over here?"

Arizona has closed the distance between herself and her family without the pair of brunettes noticing.

"Silly Mommy," their son answers with a grin, raising his arms up to her.

She picks him up without hesitation while leveling a glare at her smirking wife, who shrugs in defense. "He came up with that all on his own. Didn't you, bub?"

"Yep," he says automatically because he always agrees when asked. He's an agreeable kid, which doesn't come from either of his parents.

"Elliot Christopher, you think Mommy is silly?" Arizona questions him, but he's too busy playing in her hair to reply.

Amelia just barely stops herself from pointing out that the other woman was just talking to bunny rabbits because Arizona cries at the drop of the hat these days and Amelia refuses to be the cause of her wife's tears. Again.

"Does Mama think I'm silly?" Her dark blonde eyes are arched expectantly in Amelia's direction.

 _It's a trap._

"I think you're beautiful," she tells her, dodging the question altogether. "I also think my two favorite people need a short nap before dinner. How does that sound?" She steps forward so she can wrap her arms around Arizona and press her lips against the back of Elliot's head. "Does that sound good, bubby? Naptime with Mommy and the baby?"

"Yep," he chirps because apparently it's a good day and naptime isn't the end of his world today.

"You trying to tell me I look tired?" Arizona tries to sound teasing, but Amelia hears the edge in her voice. They are two weeks away from the twelve week safety mark, but anything can happen in two weeks and although Arizona tries not to stress about it, she is constantly worried that something will go wrong. Because it has gone wrong before. Just once, but it was enough for the both of them. It was a loss they handled, not well at first, but eventually they came together and worked through their grief as a couple.

Arizona was too sick through her first trimester with Elliot to wind herself up too much, but the pregnancy sickness isn't as debilitating with this baby and it gives her time to worry herself into a shitty mood. Not that she needs a lot of help with that because the hormones seem to have that more than covered.

At first Amelia didn't know how to navigate her emotional time bomb of a wife and it made her edgy and nervous. And then she talked to Addison and Charlotte, and got the insight she needed to be strong and stable for her wife. Now that Arizona's mood swings don't make her feel like she is about to be sucked into a tornado, she finds a strange kind of charm to them. It is their baby that is making her like this and whenever Arizona gets sick or goes from zero to one hundred in under ten seconds or feels nauseous or complains about her breasts, Amelia reminds herself that it is because their baby is living and growing and thriving.

It is that little reminder that keeps her grounded.

"No. You look radiant, Arizona," she whispers gently. "But I also know that you get tired just walking around the house, so I thought you'd appreciate joining baby boy for a short sleep."

The reverent smile that steals over Arizona's features, making her dimples appear incredible deep and her eyes twinkle with such adoration, leaves Amelia breathless for a few long moments.

She never dreamed her life would be like this, but this is much better than a dream because she never has to wake up from it.

* * *

 _When you reach for the stars, don't forget who you are.  
And please, don't turn around and grow up way too fast. _

* * *

**Hourglass by Mindy Gledhill**

 **~Elphaba C. Snow Thropp**


End file.
